Friday, May 02, 2008

An Open Letter To Elmo...

Warning - No Pictures, knitting content and a couple of not so nice words...Elmo is in trouble though I tell you!

Dear Elmo,

This is the last straw - I hate you Elmo. Yes I said it and I am thrilled to get it out there. I HATE YOU ELMO! I use to be all for you. Yes, you could never take the place of beloved blue friend Grover, but I knew you had your charms. With all your tickeling and laughing and costing thousands. I thought that was fine. Stupid but fine. Mr. Noodle he was okay and Dorothy yes she has lived 200x longer than any goldfish but that did not do it. THIS is it!

Your whole video on Potty Time needs to go. You have RUINED my two year old. Your asinine song Accidents Happen well let me tell you. NO Accidents DO NOT HAPPEN! Ever since watching your damn video my son thinks it is now fun to pee on the floor and start signing this blasted song. He says he wants to be like Elmo! Yes he was sooo good he was going on the potty for weeks. NOW RUINED. His grandmother though sent this blasted video and now he is RUINED. So thanks you little red shit! We are researching diapers for 12 year olds because that is how long it seems we are DOOMED! Again, thank you Elmo thanks for your shitty ass video and song.

You better watch out. I have informed cookie monster that you are actually a large sprinkley red cookie. See if you ruin another two year olds potty training again.


One pissed off mommy!


Teresa said...

Hey stranger! A Prince song was playing on my iPod and made me think of you and our time with Prince ;) So I decided to Google you and lo and behold, here you are!
I can't believe R is 2! Time flies! I hope you're doing well and congrats on the photography business. Email me when you get a chance. Teresa

jamie said...

I will ban this song and video from my home. Thanks for the warning! Also, Moto has been singing "C is for cookie" nonstop these days. Really cute. Of course, he watches on youtube, not old PBS like I had to, commercials and all!